dispensary worker: yeah man sorry we dont take card here… its cash only, and i dont think theres a bank called “Dillywigs”
british childrens author from 1945 who lived through world war 2: A bit of silliness never hurt anyone.. I find it makes the world far brigher than it was before. *starts walking away with the eighth*
ratgirl who calls you after getting detained at the Alberta border
Reblog to have something lgbt happen to you this summer
every year
The bond between a man and his car is as pure and strong as a mountain stream
“Women in academia” “women in leadership positions” “women in stem” blah blah blah. What about women in Me
why is she serving
Big girl walking down the sturdy street
writing tips
- cultivate the no-mind, a state of emptiness in which you can easily become a vessel for creative forces outside of your control or understanding. The Buddha nature is the first step to being a writer
- cultivate your own style by reading other people who do what you want to do and living eternally in their shadow. Your voice should be a totally unique imitation of people you will never measure up to
- you’d be surprised how far a solid pushup bra will get you. how do you think steven king got so big? honkers, baby
- anyone who edits your work is a parasite in your perfect body. You should make them roll around in shit like a dog for your approval
- they don’t all have to be winners. Most writers never write anything good, and I’m told they live just fine; there’s a sort of submissive dignity to it
- “write drunk, edit sober” is 20th century advice. Best practices in the 2020s include amphetamines. Crank, ice, what have you
- Don’t write around the dialogue tags “said” and “asked”. You will sound like a Hardy Boys novel the entire time. If you’re doing a Hardy Boys novel ignore this advice and only this advice, as it would be a disaster to write a Hardy Boys novel without tweaking off your tits
- An important principle of ancient Greek drama was hubris - that humans’ pride would leave them with no choice but to defy the will of the gods and be destroyed by their own actions. While obviously things have changed a lot in the last 2000 years, hubris is still an indispensable part of the writing process today. If you don’t have hubris, cultivate it
- You’re going to find money very difficult to come across, even in exchange for your best work. According to every expert in the field I’ve talked to, the solution to this is simple: destroy capitalism
— Love poetry discovered by Archaeologists in Egypt from the New Kingdom period 3,300 years ago.
[TEXT ID: I shall lie down at home / and pretend to be dying. / Then the neighbors will all come in / to gape at me, and, perhaps, she will come / with them. / When she comes, I won’t need a doctor, / she knows why I am ill. END ID]
Diagnosed munchhausen haver tbqh :/
guy 1: man im pissed off im like totally peeved the freak off
guy 2: why whats wrong man you can tell me anythang babygirl
guy 1: ive been talking to this trans broad from work she works in the get this in the coffee room a whole room for coffee you thought i was gonna say it didnt you well thats on you mf anyway i been talking to her cause she got a crazy ass like its insane but i found something that changed all that on god
guy 2: oh yeah? whats that honey
guy 1: shes a yuri trans girl not a yaoi trans girl
guy 2: shiiiiittttttt bro that sucks you know she posting about kissinh girls online instead of posting about boysmelll shitttttt that sucks bto
guy 1: ahah yeah whatevs :p
guy 2: well it dont matter i can be your girl i can be your princess we can kiss and rub our peanuseses togtehr
]guy 1: thanks dude i appreicate you
guy 2: no problem
the world trade centre: in this scenario 9/11 never happened
Growing up is actually all about realizing people don’t inherently dislike you and it’s a bit odd to assume they do
This
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fucking SLAY